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Chandni Chowk To China

Chandni Chowk To China, 2009’s first big release, starring Akshay Kumar, Deepika Padukone, and Ranvir Shorey, finally hit the big screen. Chandni Chowk To China was expected to break all the box office collections but the record collections of Ghajini set a new a bar for this film. Hype around the movie is good and we can expect some great news for Bollywood trade analysts.

Produced by Warner Bros, this is Nikhil Advani’s first directorial project after the not so good, Salaam-E-Ishq. And he doesn’t leave the opportunity to include a clipping of the film in this one. Looks like he also got the fever of mentioning his old work just like Yash Raj Films, Dhoom anyone? But let’s not talk about that, and let’s review Chandni Chowk To China.

Synopsis

Chandni Chowk To China is about the story of a nincompoop named Sidhu (Akshay Kumar), living in the crowded area of Chandni Chowk, and is a cook by profession. His problem is that he believes too much in luck and doesn’t want to work hard to achieve success. In short, he wants fame and money easily, just like our Indian youth, who audition for Roadies every year in search of fame. But our Sidhu doesn’t have Roadies, so he spends most of his time in buying lottery, and showing his hand to astrologers.

And with this, Chopstick (Ranvir Shorey) comes into the picture, who takes the advantage of Sidhu’s ingenuousness by stealing money from him. But Sidhu’s Dada (Mithun Chakraborty) tells him to work hard and not believe in this non-sense. Fair Enough.

But Sidhu’s destiny changes when some Chinese from a village come to India in search of their great warrior, Liu Shengh, who is supposed to be re-incarnated as Sidhu. They want him to kill the villain of the movie, Hojo, who is ruling their village. Phew! That’s just too much stuff. But there is a whole story of Deepika Padukone, playing the role of Saki, who believes that her father and twin sister, played also by her as Meow, are still alive. Don’t blame me if you’re confused.

Action is bad!

Enough of the story, let’s see how the film fairs. First things first, Chandni Chowk To China is a hybrid of Bollywood’s 80s melodrama and Chinese action movies. Some of the sequences remind me of the famous movie, Shaolin Soccer. Action is supposed to be the UPS of the movie since it is based on Kung-Fu, but it really comes close to our Rajnikant style action, for example; with one kick, Akshay Kumar can almost cause a Tsunami and blows the big boats in air, you know what I’m saying?

Confused director

Another thing which goes against the film is the confusion of the director. He doesn’t know if he wants to make it a comedy or a drama or non-brainer action film. For example; in one scene we see all of them trying to make us laugh and in the very next scene we see a river coming out of Deepika Padukone’s eyes in the form of tears, well not literally. There is no consistency in the scenes. In short there is a chaos of emotions in the movie.

Director also tries to spoof the shopping network programs, which we see often on various channels, but sadly, he falls flat on his face. There was nothing funny about it and Deepika ends up looking like an idiot, which maybe was intentional.

Technical Depratment

Dubbing is seriously third class, even if we cut out the Chinese part, dubbing sucks big time. You can clearly see them saying different dialogues or nothing at all, but you can still hear dialogues. That’s a shame! How about doing us a favor and start using sync-sound technology? Editing really needs some work and some scenes are really not required which increase the length of the movie for no reason.

Most of the songs are used as background scores, which is a good thing, except Chandni Chowk to China. Songs are good, which I already mentioned in my music review. The Rap song is used in the end credits. Chak Lein De is the best in the movie. Cinematography is great, and scenes of Great Wall of China are beautifully captured.

Performances are top class

Performance of Akshay Kumar is top notch. I’ve no complaints against him. He gives his 100% in the movie and his efforts clearly shows. Character of Sidhu looks totally natural on him, and his comedy talents shine again. Ranvir Shorey is not wasted in the movie, like he was wasted in Singh is Kinng, and he shows his talents again and proves why he is one of the best actors of our times. Mithun Da is good as usual, you can clearly see the same intensity in his role which we saw in Guru.

But Deepika Padukone shines as Meow. Her role oozes hotness in every frame and that Chinese make up and long hair, hotness at its best. She’s really good in action scenes, too. It looks like we found another action chick after Priyanka Chopra. I would love to see her doing more action roles. Her performance as Saki is average and sometimes, she really over acts.

Verdict

Chandni Chowk To China is not a great cinema, intellectually, but can be entertaining watch. It’s undoubtedly better than Singh is Kinng and Welcome. Akshay Kumar shines again, with Ranvir Shorey who gives a power house performance. Deepika Padukone is great as Meow but she really needs to work on crying scenes.

Technical department of the film fails, especially in editing and dubbing. About 15 minutes could have been cut easily. Movie is filled with a lot of loopholes and script writer is to be blamed here.

Nikhil Advani really needs to work on his direction. I wonder how he made Kal Ho Na Ho. If Karan Johar ghost directed the movie then I can understand. If they’re making a sequel of this then please improve the action scenes. Show us some Bourne style or James Bond style stuff.

And do watch out for the products they sell in the movie, a machine which can translate any language, an umbrella which can be used as a parachute and can also be used as protection against weapons, I only wonder what material they use because it really contradicts both the uses. And yeah, there is one machine which can make you dance, which is good for guys, who want to impress girls. Only if they were true, sigh!

Rating –

Cast – Akshay Kumar, Deepika Padukone, Mithun Chakraborty, Ranvir Shorey

Music Director – Shankar Ehsaan Loy

Movie Director – Nikhil Advani

Post your comments, reviews and suggestions in the comment box below and I’ll reply to them and vote in the poll.

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Chandni Chowk To China
Chandni Chowk To China, to be released next year, is already making news for its subject and treatment. Starring Akshay Kumar and Deepika Padukone in the lead, this movie is expected to rock the box office collection. Moreover, it’s produced by Warner Bros. who are looking for their first in India after debacle Saas Bahur aur Sensex.

The soundtrack of Chandni Chowk To China is indeed very interesting. Shankar Ehsaan Loy gives their second best soundtrack of the year after the momentous Rock On!! The Chinese influence in the soundtrack is a nice touch and brings something new to the table. The soundtrack of Chandni Chowk To China comprises of 6 original tracks and 2 remixes.

1. S.I.D.H.U

Well, S.I.D.H.U is not your average track because it has lively lyrics and superb singing by Kailash Kher. Somewhere in the song you’ll also laugh because of the funny lyrics. From the song you can get the idea of the condition of Akshay Kumar in the movie. Music is of classical genre but you’ll not be bored for 1 second mainly because of lyrics and Kailash. I know I’m talking about the lyrics a lot but seriously, you’ll love the song once you listen to it.

2. Chandni Chowk To China

After the superb S.I.D.H.U, here comes the second winner of the soundtrack, the title song, Chandni Chowk To China, which was released as a song promo few days back. It starts off really well with the hip-hop music and the Chinese touch as I mentioned earlier. But I wish they’d kept it that way only during the whole song but they introduce the Indian touch after a minute. It’s not that it kills the song but I would have preferred it as Hip-Hop + Chinese song. Neeraj, Shankar, and Anushka do a splendid job in the song. A chart-buster hands down.

3. India Se Aaya Tera Dost

After a superb run, here come a letdown in the form of India Se Aaya Tera Dost, sung by Bappi Lahiri and Ravi K Tripathi. What is Bappi Lahiri doing in the song? Moreover, he can’t pronounce “Salaam” properly. Add to that 6:29 minute length of the song, this song is a big no-no!

4.Tere Naina

Tere Naina is superb, that would be an understatement for this song. Sung superbly by Shankar Mahadevan and Shreya Ghoshal, Tere Naina will catch your attention from the first listen only. Music is so good that sometimes I feel that I’m in the future while listening to it. I know it sounds stupid but seriously, there is something really good about this song. Best song of the soundtrack hands down and kudos to SEL for giving us such a fabulous track.

5. Chak Lein De

While S.I.D.H.U was a superb song by Kailash, Chak Lein De on the other hand is an above average song. It you listen to it 4 or 5 times it’ll surely grow on you mainly because of the lyrics and santoor in the song. Kailash gives the right amount of energy required for the song and makes it worth a listen.

6. C C 2 C

Now here we have Akhsay Kumar trying to rap in Punjabi with Punjabi rapper Bohemia. Sounds interesting, right? But Akshay is a big letdown in this one. You can clearly figure out that Akshay is trying so hard to rhyme but it’s not working at all. He sounds like a wannabe. Add to that self-proclaimed lyrics “Saara Bollywood ek mera koi nahi mel, acting karne chale hazaroon baadshah ek baaki saare fail.” This is not a very good idea Mr. Akshay Kumar. You sound really arrogant.

Verdict

Chandni Chowk To China is a sure shot winner for Shankar Ehsaan Loy and for the entire team of the movie. It’s a really fresh soundtrack with great lyrics and superb singing. Tere Naina clearly stands out and will be loved by all. Title track and S.I.D.H.U are two chart-buster songs and rest of the stuff is just average material. Also check out the covers of Chandni Chowk To China, Deepika looks stunning in her two avatars.

Rating –

Cast – Akshay Kumar, Deepika Padukone, Mithun Chakraborty, Ranvir Shorey

Music Director – Shankar Ehsaan Loy

Movie Director – Nikhil Advani

Post your comments, reviews and suggestions in the comment box below and I’ll reply to them and vote in the poll.

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Dasvidaniya

When Vinay Pathak, Ranvir Shorey, and Rajat Kapoor come together for a movie, they always create magic. Mixed Doubles, Bheja Fry and Mithya are the perfect examples of their magic and this time, it is Dasvidaniya. A story about a middle class person, Amar Kaul, played by Vinay Pathak, who is suffering from cancer and is about to die in 3 months and then decides to fulfill all his ambitions before dying, Dasvidaniya is an engaging watch.

I know the story is so not original, but it’s the treatment of the film that makes Dasvidaniya a gem to come out this year. What really makes it special is the impact it has on you while watching it. In the modern time where stock market is coming down, terrorism is increasing even faster than Akshay Kumar’s pay check, Dasvidaniya gives a middle class man a hope to live again and that too with full zeal.

All the credit for this movie goes to the performances by the actors, especially that of Vinay Pathak, Sarita Joshi (playing Amar’s mom), and Gaurav Gera. Add to that, a tight script and superb direction, Dasvidaniya is sure shot winner which will win your hearts. Movie is filled with so many emotional moments that you can’t help yourself from going gaga over the film.

I mean, how can you explain the joy of a mother when she finds out that her son bought a big car, or how can you not feel bad for the mother when she finds out that her son is going to die, and then try every method in order to save his life?

Also, the scene in which Vinay says “I love you” to his childhood love who is married to someone else and has a daughter, or when he hugs his brother after telling him that he is going to die, I mean these are the moments which force you to get up and fulfill all your dreams before your life is over.

And how can I not mention the song “Mumma”, which he sings for his mother, this is a song which will force you to cry even if your heart is made of bricks. If you thought “Maa” from Taare Zameen Par was the ultimate song for your mom then think again.

Verdict

Dasvidaniya is an emotional journey of a man to which we all can relate and feel his anger and disappointments. If you’re tired from your life and think that it sucks even more than that of Britney Spears’s, then watch Dasvidaniya. You’ll not regret these 2 hours of your life.

Rating –

Cast – Vinay Pathak, Ranvir Shorey, Rajat Kapoor, Neha Dhupia, Saurabh Shukla, Gaurav Gera, Sarita Joshi

Music Director – Kailash Kher

Movie Director – Shashant Shah

Do you want to comment on the movie or my review? Then go to comment box and do it. I’ll reply to them and don’t forget to vote in the poll.

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How many times have you heard those Santa Banta jokes? I know, a lot of times. But now people might include one more character to Santa Banta and make it trio and that character would be Happy Singh from the movie Singh is Kinng.

Singh is Kinng

Singh is Kinng is about a halfwit Sikh guy, Happy Singh (Akshay Kumar), from a village in Punjab who always cause trouble to village people and they are vexed by his unique ability to cause troubles. So, in order to get rid of him, they pack-off him to Australia to bring underworld King, Lucky Singh (Sonu Sood), back to their village. There he lands into various troubles and meet the love of his life, Sonia (Katrina Kaif), who is already committed.

This is the general outline of the film and to be honest, it is not that “original”. Singh is Kinng is filled with serendipities and misunderstandings. Add a lot of toilet jokes to it, and there you have a typical Anees Bazmee movie. His last movie, Welcome, was a big success, but the same thing can’t be said about the reviews from both the critics and the audience. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, check out IMDB.com, there it only got 5.4/10 rating from 825 votes.

But that was the past, now let’s get back to Singh is Kinng. Honestly speaking, Singh is Kinng is a very competent idea of the director to make huge money, just like with Welcome, without even giving a damn about the audience who pays a lot to watch an amiable and sensible comedy.

From the title of the movie, you expect it to have some different approach to portray Sikhs in the Bollywood movies unlike those movies in which Sikhs are represented as cretinous (idiots). But no, this movie is the same like those movies. I’m a person who believes in providing full liberty to the artist to express his opinions, even if they offend someone.

But, if you give a title Singh is Kinng to a movie, then I expect you to justify the title of the movie. Sadly, this is not the case with this one. No doubt, this movie would be a big hit, but when it comes to morals and honesty towards your work, it falls flat.

Performances

Akshay Kumar

He is undoubtedly the king of comedies and he is proving his worth with every movie. He really gets into the character of Happy Singh, and delivers it with brilliance.

But again, I’ve one question for him. I know you are a popular star now, but why are you pretending to care about the Sikhs? You go on blabbering about Singh is Kinng on award shows and promotional events, but where is your honesty towards the subject?

Just say that, “I only want to make money out of it and I don’t give a shit about anything else. I want to be the King of Bollywood.”

You should use your popularity to do some movies that can send some good message among the youth of India instead of doing such cheap movies. That is the difference between you and Aamir Khan and ShahRukh Khan.

Katrina Kaif

Please someone tell this girl to stop acting. This is one of the worst performances I’ve seen in a long time. She can even make Ayesha Takia’s performance in De Taali as an Oscar worthy performance.

I know you’ve the looks that can make any guy want to be with you in bed and believe me, directors and producers are using you for this reason only. You don’t stand anywhere close to the other female actors in terms of acting like Vidya Balan, Deepika Padukone, Kareena Kapoor, hell you are even worse than Aishwarya Rai and I’m really serious about this.

Please go to some good acting school and learn some acting. You’re just an eye candy in the movies and I don’t think it is a good sign for your career.

Supporting Cast

I’m really mad about the wastage of Ranvir Shorey in this movie. He is one of the best actors to come out from Bollywood in recent times. Why did you waste such a wonderful talent in your movie, Anees Bazmee?

Om Puri shares a good chemistry with Akshay and gives an above average performance. Kirron Kher really stands out in the movie. Javed Jaffrey, Neha Dhupia and Sonu Sood give average performances.

Final Words – Singh is Kinng is your average Akshay Kumar entertainer. Go to the cinema hall without your brain and you’ll enjoy it, although chances are less. Akshay Kumar carries this movie on his shoulders. If you are a diehard fan of Akshay Kumar, then it would be a perfect treat for you. And if you are not, better wait it to come on TV.

One advice to Anees Bazmee – Please stop making such stupid movies and use your talent in a better way. I know you want to make a lot of money, but please, don’t do it on the expense of someone’s feelings and yes, I’m talking about Sikhs. Have some morals and I’m talking to you too, Akshay!

I’m not a religious fanatic and I simply don’t care about anything but not everyone is like me. But I can bet that many Sikh groups would be pissed at this movie. I was going through the reviews of the movie and found one on Sikhnet. Do read it and you’ll see what they think about this one.

Verdict – If brainless and toilet humor is your taste of a good comedy then go watch it. Be my guest. But if your taste is opposite to mentioned above then refrain yourself from this one.

Box-office result – It would be a big hit as I mentioned earlier, considering the hype around this movie. But sometimes, there is something more than just money which is certainly not true for both the director and the actors.

Rating – 2 out of 5

Your views – Post your reviews on the movie as comments in the box below. Or if you’ve something against my review then also post it. I would be glad to reply to it.

Note to readers – I’m not saying that performance of Akshay Kumar was bad or something, I’m just saying that there was no story at all, humor was cheap and it didn’t justify the title of the movie and the promises it made. You can always read the reviews of other critics like that of Rajeev Masand of CNN-IBN.

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